Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Inquiring Minds Want to Know

After you've written a book, people start asking you questions about the topic of your book. That's because writing a book automatically makes you an expert. So, since the recent publication of my dating memoir/self-help book, Confessions of a Middle-Aged Babe Magnet, I've begun receiving emails that ask me questions about dating and relationships. Plus, some men and women want to share their dating stories with me.

And I think that's pretty cool.

From time to time I'm going to share some of those questions in this blog, and I'll also share my answers. So here goes:

Dear Chad:

My boyfriend and I are getting pretty serious (spending 3 or 4 nights together every week), and he's been talking a lot about moving in together. We're not engaged, and I'm worried if I move in with him he'll never feel the need to get married. What should I do? I don't want our relationship to stall out but I'm worried that he won't want to "buy the cow if he can get the milk for free."

Thanks for any insight.

Dear Stephanie:

I hate to break it to you, but unless you and your boyfriend are sleeping in separate bedrooms when he stays over, he's already getting the milk for free. But the decision to move in together is a big one, and It sounds like what you ultimately want is marriage. Right? So talk to him. Communication is important in every stage of a relationship, especially when BIG decisions need to be made.

Have you ever talked about the M word with him? If not, you better talk soon. Don't scare him away with an ultimatum or deadline, but make sure he knows how you feel about marriage. AND MAKE SURE YOU FIND OUT HOW HE FEELS ABOUT IT. If he's one of those hard-to-pin-down, doesn't-want-to-make-a-commitment males, then you are probably not going to change him. No matter how wonderful you are.

Chad Stone
Chad Stone is the author of Confessions of a Middle-Aged Babe Magnet: One Man's Brave Adventure into Dating Again in the 21st Century, available on

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