Saturday, February 23, 2013

Dating After Divorce: Dating Dealbreakers

One of the best things about Twitter is hashtags. Just using a hashtag (#) followed by a short phrase makes it possible to follow a specific topic as it trends across the Twitterverse.

Last week, the hashtag #MajorTurnOffs was abuzz with dealbreakers about dating. These pithy little comments sum up the complaints against people who are bad dates—and who probably aren’t worthy of seeing again. Anyone who has been dating after divorce is going to recognize a lot of these. (Thanks to for compiling this list.) And thanks to Twitter, too.

Dating Dealbreakers Number 1-5

• a man who isn't gainfully employed

• People who are rude to servers or other customer service people.

• When you can’t tell me how large the national debt is, but you know every detail about Kim and Yeezy’s life.

• married men who flirt with you behind their wives back/in front of their wives faces.

• when females act like they don’t trust men at all.

Dating Dealbreakers Number 6-10

• mentioning an ex like they're still obsessed with them. (Is this a dating after divorce red flag, or what?)

• past drama-- I need to know that your past is your past, your ex is your ex, and that I’m not a backup

• When someone says, “I liked that band way before they were famous.”

• Not being ok with divorce. It’s kind of my thing. (Yeah, if you’re dating after divorce, that could be a real sore spot.)

• Someone that’s just always negative & never has anything good to say about anything or anyone.

Dating Dealbreakers Number 11-15

• people who try to rush relationships. Breathe and settle down. We aren’t getting married tomorrow.

• someone who’s ignorant

• Flirting with other people while on a date.

• making promises they already know they are not going to keep

• I’d say indecisiveness. Or maybe not. Tough one. (Ha! When you’re dating after divorce, you need to have a sense of humor!)

Dating Dealbreakers Number 16-20

• when you’ve got nothing good to say about your exes. What are you going to be saying about me if it doesn't work out?

• If you can’t hold an intelligent conversation with me.

• Guys who get drunk on the 1st date, esp if I’m not even drinking.

• Beautiful people with ugly personalities

And one of mine own: someone who doesn’t even show up for the first date—and doesn’t even call or text. Just a no show. That’s a case of “one strike and you’re out.”

So what do you think? Is this a good list? Leave a comment and let us know what your dating dealbreaker is. And thanks for reading.

This is Chad Stone, author of Confessions of a Middle-Aged Babe Magnet, signing off.

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