Author Chad Stone Talks About and Signs His New Dating Memoir

Book Talk and Signing

I am happy to be talking about Confessions of a Middle-Aged Babe Magnet and signing books tomorrow in Albuquerque. I have been invited to appear at one of the best independent bookstores in the West, Page One Bookstore, to give a talk and sign copies of my book.

I will start by reading a few passages from the book, which is a good way to introduce the story and my unique perspective on dating and finding love. Then I will open it up to questions so people can learn more about my experiences and whether the book has a happy ending.

Dating After Divorce

One of the questions I'm sure that will be asked is, "Why did you write a book about daving after divorce?" One of the reasons I wrote Confessions of a Middle-Aged Babe Magnet was because there weren't any books written from the male perspective that dealt with both the highs and lows of the single life. No one had told the story about what it's like to be a single man in the 21st century who is looking for the last love of his life.

I wanted to write a book that talked honestly about these things:

-- What do men want?
-- What do women want?
-- Do men and women want basically the same things?
-- What is it like in the "Dating Over 50" world?
-- Can you find true love at any ages?
-- Sex and the single adult
-- Tips for online dating
-- What skills are necessary to win and woo a woman
-- What are men thinking-- really?

To help promote my book signing event, I appeared on the Good Day New Mexico TV show on Friday. You can watch the clip here: Chad Stone on TV

So if you can make it to Page One Bookstore on Sunday, Oct. 28 at 2:30 pm, please come by!

Author Chad Stone talks about his book about dating, "Confessions of a Middle Aged Babe Magnet"

Chad Stone
Book signing and discussion
"Confessions of a Middle Aged Babe Magnet"
October 28 at 2:30 p.m.

Page One Bookstore
11018 Montgomery Blvd NE
Albuquerque, NM

Is Your Dog Helping Your Love Life?



This is NOT a manly man dog.



Now you have a new excuse if your love life stinks: Blame your dog.

Smart men have known for a long time that dogs can be babe magnets. The right dog, at the right place and time (such as at a park on a sunny Saturday afternoon) can be the perfect conversation starter between a single man and a single woman.

But what kind of dog is best? And what kind of dog is a buzz-kill for your love life?

Kloof, a new iPhone app for pet lovers, conducted a study of which breeds of dog might be the best babe magnet or man magnet for its owner. I’m sure we are all dying to find out the results of the survey, right?

There’s good news for women who own golden retrievers. That was the breed selected in this unscientific survey to be the number one breed to attract men. And those men are most likely to view women with golden retrievers as “girlfriend material.” Rounding out the Top Five “man magnet” dogs were Labrador retrievers, Chihuahuas, poodles and beagles.

I understand the logic of golden retrievers and labradors being man magnets. After all, those are dogs that appeal to manly men. Those are real dogs—dogs that like to chase things and bring them back to you; dogs that are way too big to sit comfortably in your lap or ride around in a pink purse. But I don’t know why Chihuahuas, poodles and beagles are man magnets. Chihuahuas and poodles are girly dogs, and beagles are the dumbest breed of dog on the planet. A beagle is dumber that a box of oatmeal.

In the babe magnet category, these breeds of dogs were ranked by women as those that would make them think most highly of the men that owned them: German shepherds, golden retrievers, Labrador retrievers, Siberian huskies and French bulldogs. According to the survey, men with German shepherds and retrievers are seen as “great dad” material, and men who own a Siberian husky are “manly.”



There are some dog breeds that transfer a negative connotation to their owners. Men say that women with a poodle or Chihuahua are likely to be “high maintenance.” And women say that men who own bulldogs, boxers and rottweilers are, shall we say, not the sharpest tools in the shed.

How does this “Dog Theory of Sexiness” actually play in the real world? Well, I have never in my life owned a “manly” dog, but I did own a girlie-man poodle when I met the lovely woman who has since become my lovely wife. Fortunately (especially for me), owning a girlie-man dog was not a deal-breaker for her. She was able to look past my poodle and see the manly man within me.

But, if you’re a guy with a poodle or other non-manly dog, now you have a great excuse if you aren’t happy with your love life. But then you’ll have to deal with the guilt trip that your dog lays on you.

Chad Stone

Author, Confessions of a Middle-Aged Babe Magnet

(available on amazon.com)



What Do Online Profiles Reveal About Us?

Have you ever tried online dating? If you've been single in the past decade, the answer is probably yes. According to recent surveys, about 20% of couples who have recently become couples met online. Yours truly, Chad Stone, included.

R. Luke DuBois, who describes himself as a New York City-based "artist and computer programmer," wondered what our online profiles reveal about us. He analyzed profiles from 21 top dating sites and broke them into individual zip codes. Then he determined where certain words appeared more often than anywhere else.

Fascinating idea, huh?

Some of the results were fairly predicatable. The words "acting" and "vegetarian" appeared most often in Southern California. "Gay" and "grass" were popular words used in Northern California online profiles. "Mullet" was used most often in Alabama, as was "prayer." "Sox" (as in Red Sox) topped the list in the Boston area. "Casino" and "cathouse" and "gambling" were commonly used in Nevada's online profiles.

But then there were plenty of surprising and/or bizarre results in Mr. DuBois's statistics. "Marshmallow" was a popular word in Iowa-- hopefully not to describe people's bodies. "Curvy" was the big word in Louisiana, and that WAS probably used to describe female bodies. "Wet," "hard," "cougar," and "picky" were all popular in Washington State, but probably not in the same sentence. "Gal" was a popular word used to describe women in North Dakota. (I didn't know anyone still used that word.) And singles in Texas used the word "bust" more than anywhere else.

So, what can we learn from these results? Maybe that the USA is an enormous country that is far from being homogenous. Regional differences still rule-- and I think that's a very good thing.

But no matter where you are single in America, you're in good company. We're all looking for "love."

NOTE: Check back next week for info about my upcoming book, Confessions of a Middle-Aged Babe Magnet by Chad Stone!

What Do Singles Think About Sex and Marriage?

Single people across America have spoken, and they don’t all want to get married. The recently released Singles in America survey asked 5,541 single adults in the USA aged 21 and over about their dating habits, sexual habits and opinions about marriage.

And the survey said…

When asked, “Do you want to get married?,” 27.0 percent said No, 38.6 percent weren’t sure, and 34 percent said Yes. That’s not exactly an overwhelming vote for the institution of marriage. But it’s not a total surprise, either.

Society’s rigid beliefs about the necessity of marriage (especially the need for marriage before having sex) have softened considerably since the dawn of the Sexual Revolution in the 1960s. With the social stigma of cohabitating largely removed, many single adults—especially younger ones—are simply choosing to live together without the formality of a marriage license. Even so, the majority of younger single adults still see marriage in their futures. Among singles aged 21 to 39, 62 percent of women and 56 percent of men want to eventually get married.

So what are singles looking for in a long-term romantic partner? 13 percent of women and 7 percent of men said they “must have” a partner of the same religion. 36 percent of women and 13 percent of men must have someone who makes as much money as they do.

What were the top “deal breakers” in a possible romantic partner? In order of importance: 67 percent said having a disheveled or unclean appearance, 66 percent said laziness, 63 percent said being too needy, 54 percent said having no sense of humor, and 49 percent said living more than three hours apart. (That’s really bad news for lazy slobs who need constant reassurance, don’t think Modern Family is the funniest show on TV and live far, far way.)

The Singles in America survey also revealed that first dates are often highly sexual. More than half (55 percent) of singles said they have had sex on the first date (66 percent of men and 44 percent of women). Some experts say that the popularity of online dating is partly responsible for sexy first dates. But the time they have a first physical date, many online dating singles have exchanged plenty of emails and talked often on the phone, which may be the equivalent of three dates. So by the time they meet in person, all of this online sharing can result in highly sexually charged first dates.

And yes, online dating is a force to be reckoned with. According to the survey, 21 percent of singles met the last person they dated online—the most common way of meeting cited in the survey.

So are there any surprises in the survey results for you? What’s the biggest relationship deal-breaker for you? And what is the number one Must Have in your next significant other?

Please leave a comment, and I will share some additional thoughts about dating must-haves and deal breakers in a future post on the Middle-Aged Babe Magnet blog. Until then, this is Chad Stone, signing off.

p.s. Also check out my Advice for Men posts on www.datingwithoutdrama.com

When Should a Man Call?

I ran into a friend of mine the other day. The last time I saw him was at a wedding, and he had struck up a conversation with a nice single woman. Things had gone so well that he had left with her phone number.

That was three months ago. He still hasn’t called her. “Do you think it’s too late to give her a call?” he asked me.

I wanted to slap him upside the head.

Yes, you clueless man, three months is too late to call. By now, she probably has forgotten who you are. And if she still remembers you, it’s only because she’s still pissed that you didn’t call.

There’s a bit a folk wisdom among single men called the Three Day Rule. According to the Three Day Rule, a man should wait three days before calling a woman after he has gotten her phone number. Men think that waiting for three days shows women that they are not desperate or needy. They think waiting three days communicates manlymanness. (That’s a word that I just made up, by the way. Sometimes manly men make up their own words.)

I used to agree with the Three Day Rule. It made me feel manly. But not anymore.

Why did I change my mind? I talked to some women, and they all told me the Three Day Rule was really stupid. In fact, it was so stupid that it must have been invented by a man.

These women told me, “If I am interested in a man, I want to hear from him. I don’t want to wait three days. If he waits for three days, then that tells me he’s not as interested in me as I am in him.”

After that, I never again waited three days to call a woman. Usually, I called the next day. And I can tell you, I never got a single complaint from a woman telling me that I called her too soon.

What do you think about the Three Day Rule? I’d like to hear your opinions—so please comment! Thanks for reading.


Signing off for now,
Chad Stone
(sometimes known as the Middle-Aged Babe Magnet)
Also check out my Advice from Men columns on www.datingwithoutdrama.com

What Do Women Want?

I had the opportunity to ask two attractive middle-aged women what they want in a man. What is it that they are looking for?

Instead of telling me that they want good looks or financial stability, they said they were attracted to a man with confidence.

That's right, confidence.

Confidence turns them on. They love it when a man is confident enough to approach them in a restaurant or a bar or standing in line at Starbucks. They love it when a man has the confidence to say "hi" and strike up a conversation.

No rehearsed "pick-up" lines. No over-the-top arrogance. Just good old-fashioned confidence in being the kind of man that a woman would want to talk to.

Maybe that can explain why gorgeous women are sometimes seen with not-so-gorgeous men. It's the confidence, baby.