The Best and Worst Pickup Lines Ever (Part 1)

Single people have a fascination with pickup lines. Men are on a constant search for the best pickup line, and women are always comparing notes with other women to laugh about the worst pickup lines they've ever heard.

So I thought it was time to find out from you--and all of your single friends--if there is such a thing as THE BEST PICKUP LINE EVER. And, while we're at it, let's also find out what's THE WORST PICKUP LINE EVER.

Here in America, we love to vote. We just voted for president. That's important, for sure. But now it's time to focus that election furvor on something even more controversial than voting for president. Now it's time to vote for pickup lines. And I invite the rest of the world to join in. This vote goes beyond the imaginary lines that separate countries. This is so important that we will exclude no one. If you live anywhere on Planet Earth, you are eligible to vote in this election.

(Cue the uplifting music)

Pickup lines are a time-tested tradition in the world of men meeting women. For thousands of years, single men have been walking up to single women that they do not know and saying the magic words that might capture the favorable attention of the women.

For the first time in history, through the power of the Internet, now we can take a worldwide poll on the World Wide Web and find out, once and for all, which is The Best Pickup Line Ever and which is The Worst Pickup Line Ever.

In ROUND ONE, please vote for your favorite line and your least favorite line. Here they are:

1. Good thing I brought my library card, 'cause I'm checking you out.

2. Hi. My name is Windows. Can I crash at your place?

3. A girl as beautiful as you shouldn't go out alone. Let me take you home.

4. If I was your coworker, I'd sexually harrass you.

To vote, simply submit a comment stating your Favorite line from the list above and your Least Favorite. Feel free to tell why you voted as you did, and feel free to submit a good or bad pickup line as a candidate for a future round of voting.

PLEASE SEND A LINK TO THIS POST TO YOUR FRIENDS AND TO EVERYONE ON THE PLANET. LET'S GIVE EVERYONE A CHANCE TO VOTE IN THIS VERY IMPORTANT ELECTION! THEN COME BACK NEXT WEEK TO VOTE IN ROUND TWO.

May the pickup lines be with you.

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Chad Stone is the author of Confessions of a Middle-Aged Babe Magnet. Please Like the book on Facebook.

Design the Cover of My New Book!

I am excited to tell you that my new book, Confessions of a Middle-Aged Babe Magnet, is now undergoing final editing. A big-time book editor named Floyd is now polishing each sentence and getting the manuscript ready for publication. (Go, Floyd, go!)

The book will be published as an Amazon Kindle e-book, and it will be available for downloading in March 2012. The book is a humorous memoir of my personal dating experiences. The folks who have read the manuscript have said it is "laugh-out-loud funny" and "very instructional." I know, that's a weird combination, but it's a weird and wonderful book. In some ways, it's a self-help manual for single adults, because I share Babe Magnet Rules throughout the book that give pithy advice to single men in their quest for the Babe of their dreams.


Best of all, the book has a happy ending. I really did find True Love!

So, as the book marches toward publication, I officially announce the Babe Magnet Book Cover Design Contest. That's where you come in. Create a snappy, visually appealing "book cover" for Confessions of a Middle-Aged Babe Magnet. In addition to the title, you also have to include the author's name-- Chad Stone. Make sure everything is readable in the small online Amazon Kindle web format. Make sure your submission is an original work of art, and you own all the rights to whatever images you use. The creator of the winning book cover image will win $250 and the fame and accolades that go with designing a big-time cover for a big-time book.

Here's some important technical info:
Kindle books must have a marketing cover image provided for use on the website detail page. The preferred format for the cover is a JPEG image of 600 x 800 pixels. More specifications are available here.

The deadline for submission of book cover images is Feb. 24, 2012. Send a JPEG image of your cover design to babemagnetchad@aol.com. Write to me if you have any questions.

So please get your creative juices flowing. I look forward to seeing your book cover designs!

p.s. Please pass the word about this contest!